act brave

This excerpt from Wheelchair Kamikaze (who I will meet tomorrow!) got me thinking - as his posts almost always do:
Sometimes, the only way to be brave is to act brave. MS is some scary shit, and fear might as well be listed as one of its symptoms. But fear can be conquered, and every day, in the MS patients I know online and in real life, I see a quiet courage that is constantly put to the test but rarely wavers. In the end, we live each day as best we can, MS and the fear that comes with it be damned.

Tomorrow is Mom's 60th birthday. From the outside I wonder if it somehow doesn't seem as devastating that she's in her condition in the nursing home when there's a "6" in front of her age. 40's and 50's, sure that's HORRIBLE that she's in a home. From the outside, now that my siblings and I are all grown... does it seem so bad? Sure she's going to be 60, and it's culturally more acceptable to be in a home in your 60's. But that doesn't erase the last 15 years of her 40's and 50's she spent there. It is bad, no matter what anybody on the outside might think or see.

I don't know what the difference between being brave and acting brave feels like. I wonder if Mom does either. She has put on a brave face and laughed hardships off for so long... as have I. As I'm sure have siblings, and Mom's siblings and parents. And our support systems - acting brave to support each of us. Acting brave is all I know of bravery. That's all I have to say about that.